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Inspirational
Soup For The Soul
One
in a million
He
was in the first third grade class I taught at Saint Mary's School.
All 34 of my students were dear to me, but Mark was one in a million.
Very neat in appearance, but had that happy-to-be-alive attitude that
made even his occasional mischievousness delightful. Mark talked incessantly.
I had to remind him again and again that talking without permission
was not acceptable. What impressed me so much, though, was his sincere
response every time I had to correct him for misbehaving. "Thank
you for correcting me, Sister!". I didn't know what to make of
it at first, but before long I became accustomed to hearing it many
times a day.
One morning my patience was growing thin when Mark talked once too often,
and then I made a novice teacher's mistake. I looked at Mark and said,
"If you say one more word, I am going to tape your mouth shut!".
It wasn't ten seconds later when Chuck blurted out, "Mark is talking
again."
I hadn't asked any of the students to help me watch Mark, but since
I had stated the punishment in front of the class, I had to act on it.
I remember the scene as if it had occurred this morning. I walked to
my desk, very deliberately opened my drawer and took out a roll of masking
tape. Without saying a word, I proceeded to Mark's desk, tore off two
pieces of tape and made a big X with them over his mouth. I then returned
to the front of the room.
As I glanced at Mark to see how he was doing, he winked at me. That
did it!! I started laughing. The class cheered as I walked back to Mark's
desk, removed the tape, and shrugged my shoulders. His first words were,
"Thank you for correcting me, Sister."
At the end of the year, I was asked to teach junior high math. The years
flew by, and before I knew it Mark was in my classroom again. He was
more handsome than ever and just as polite. Since he had to listen carefully
to my instruction in the "new math," he did not talk as much
in ninth grade as he had in third.
One Friday, things just didn't feel right. We had worked hard on a new
concept all week, and I sensed that the students were frowning, frustrated
with themselves and edgy with one another. I had to stop this crankiness
before it got out of hand. So I asked them to list the names of the
other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between
each name. Then I told them to think of the nicest thing they could
say about each of their classmates and write it down. It took the remainder
of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students
left the room, each one handed me the papers. Charlie smiled. Mark said,
"Thank you for teaching me, Sister. Have a good weekend."
That
Saturday, I wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet
of paper, and I listed what everyone else had said about that individual.
On Monday I gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire
class was smiling.
"Really?" I heard whispered. "I never knew that meant
anything to anyone!" "I didn't know others liked me so much."
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. I never knew if they
discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter.
The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with
themselves and one another again. That group of students moved on.
Several
years later, after I returned from vacation, my parents met me at the
airport. As we were driving home, Mother asked me the usual questions
about the trip the weather, my experiences in general. There was a lull
in the conversation. Mother gave Dad a sideways glance and simply says,
"Dad?"
My father cleared his throat as he usually did before something important.
"We had a call last night from Marks' parents," he began.
"Really?" I said. "I haven't heard from them in years.
I wonder how Mark is." Dad responded quietly. "Mark was killed
in Vietnam," he said. "The funeral is tomorrow, and his parents
would like it if you could attend." To this day I can still point
to the exact spot on I494 where Dad told me about Mark.
I had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. Mark looked
so handsome, so mature. All I could think at that moment was, "Mark
I would give all the masking tape in the world if only you would talk
to me."
The church was packed with Mark's friends. Chuck's sister sang "The
Battle Hymn of the republic." Why did it have to rain on the day
of the funeral? It was difficult enough at the graveside. The pastor
said the usual prayers, and the bugler played taps. One by one those
who loved Mark took a last walk by the coffin and sprinkled it with
holy water. I was the last one to bless the coffin. As I stood there,
one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to me. "Were
you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. I nodded as I continued to
stare at the coffin. "Mark talked about you a lot," he said.
After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates headed to Chuck's
farmhouse for lunch. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously
waiting for me. "We want to show you something," his father
said, taking a wallet out of his pocket. "They found this on Mark
when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it."
Opening
the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper
that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. I knew
without looking that the papers were the ones on which I had listed
all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him. "Thank
you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can
see, Mark treasured it."
Mark's
classmates started to gather around us. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly
and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk
at home." Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in
our wedding album." "I have mine too," Marilyn said.
"It's in my diary." Then Vicki, another classmate, reached
into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled
list to the group. I carry this with me at all times," Vicki said
without batting an eyelash. "I think we all saved our lists."
That's when I finally sat down and cried. I cried for Mark and for all
his friends who would never see him again. The density of people in
society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we
don't know when that one day will be.
So
please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special
and important. Tell them, before it is too late.
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